Sex, Love and Other Drugs: My Cross-Addictions

I deserve love. I write it out on my mirror, as my therapist suggests, and I repeat it to myself multiple times a day. I think it’s bullshit. Why do I have to keep telling myself this? She keeps assigning me tasks that I do not want to do and I am tired of all this talk about self-love and vulnerability.

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5 Totally Awesome Reasons Why Sobriety Is The Best Gift

Sobriety is rad AF. Did I just say that? Yes, I did. And 3 years ago, when I was new to recovery, I never would have imagined thinking that sobriety was cool. But, it is. Sobriety is the greatest gift I have ever received. I didn’t ask for this gift; it asked for me. I never would have believed that I could live a sober, spiritual, and connected life. Pre-sobriety, I believed that I would live a successful, wealthy, and perfect life. My goal wasn’t to find inner peace or to be helpful to others – my goal was to climb the ladder of success, so I could appear and/or feel powerful. My life, pre-sobriety, was about accomplishments and praise from others and power.

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This Me is Me.

Over the past two years, I am learning to be human again. I don’t fully understand addiction – the whys, the hows, the for what reasons? Is it a disease? Is it a choice? Does it stem from trauma? Is it genetic?  Why are some people addicted and others not?

There are masters studying this very thought. I don’t consider myself to be a master. I am just a student.

The only truth I know about addiction is that it is painful. The best truth I know about sobriety is that it is miraculous. Even in the ins and the outs – the hard parts and the sad days, even in the downright disastrous experiences of life – sobriety is miraculous.

 

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